Journal | May 2023

May was a month of change, restoration, rejuvenation and adjustment. At the end of April I finished a job I had loved after 6 years with a great team, and so May felt like an awkward month of adjusting to the new normal. Going from almost 19 years in corporate environments shaping my week, my daily to do list and then doing my own thing with the future ahead of me felt both freeing and uncertain. The month was spent adjusting and doing my own thing, starting to gently think about the next stages of my career and life. Peppered in amongst the many bank holiday weekends I made some progress in my home with some long overdue sorting and tidying.

My favourite moments from May

Here are some of my favourite moments from the month of May:

Three days at a Gateway to Garden Design course - I adored my three days spent here and felt excited and nervous at the prospect of a new career on the horizon. We covered some of key elements of the garden design process as well as what the year long course will include. We completed some creative exercises, made a start designing a garden using a brief we created and all talked about what we loved about our passion for gardens. It felt so special gathering together in person with strangers with a shared interest, it is something I haven’t done for a while and it gave me and energy I had missed. Some of those who attended I think will be joining the course alongside me in September which will be so wonderful.

Holiday to Ibiza - as a family we headed to Ibiza in early May and had a break away we had been waiting for. Sunshine, pool time, good food, time on the beach and headspace to read a book whilst Chloe went to the kids club in the morning for a few hours was what I needed. My head did switch to the ‘what’s next’ feeling and thoughts and so I gave myself sometime to think about it.

Time in our garden - the joy of being home most days has been the space to dedicate to the ultimate self-care time I have, time in our garden. This month I’ve cared and observed the garden doing what I had hoped I would do. In December I planted 300 bulbs in our space, knowing that in the Spring I would likely be redundant, out of a job I loved, or trying to create plans for the future. I knew I would be turning to my garden sanctuary for the time and the bright bulbs blooming would lift my spirits considerably. Time spent with a home made coffee and magazines in the sunshine, was the perfect antidote to years in front of a screen. A way to decompress, watch the birds darting around our garden and a watching a few insects enjoy the space.

Exploring our city - There is so much in Bristol which we love and we decided to be a tourist in our own city for a few days of different weekend activities. Heading to Clifton to do a treasure trail, walking across the Clifton Suspension Bridge as a family, and enjoying ice creams. the highlight for me was seeing the excitement on Chloe’s face being so high up on the bridge and her determination to walk across without holding my hand (for most of it!).

Documenting our life - I’ve spent some of my month catching up on documenting Chloe’s artwork and photographing our garden more than I’ve done in a while. Both documentation and photography are hobbies which feel good and I really appreciated my hobbies in the moment. I did some sewing listening to a podcast, focused on documenting a few moments of our city trips and tried to get as many photos of us as a family.

Joining online communities - I wanted to join a few online communities to support my next phase of my career and found what felt like home in a group. A supportive group of female small business owners at The Wild Academy. Connecting weekly on a call I felt I was rooting into new connections and routines which was something I hoped I’d do.

Reflecting on finishing a job I loved - It goes without saying that it’s an odd feeling, enjoyable in someways and needed to help bring a chapter to a close. I loved the people I worked with and know what a gift this can be, I worked somewhere I crafted a job into my strengths and skillset, as well as leaning into new things. I loved the purposeful approach to business, the product connected to plants and wellbeing and the efforts and thought which went into that process. I can only feel gratitude for the experience and also to get a gift of redundancy and the support which goes with it. There aren’t many times in life where you can leave feeling great about your input. The sadness for me comes from the loss of our team legacy. I know people will remember how we did our roles but all the progressive project work has been shelved as the company merges into the parent company and different values and approaches will likely change the beauty of what we created. I think that’s why garden design, garden consultancy and life coaching appeal and creating my own business allows me to be in control. The reflection helped me decide how I wanted to sculpt my next chapter and I started working on a few things behind the scenes.

May was a month which became a space of processing, leaning into the discombulation of a month of many bank holidays and change. I feel huge gratitude for having the space, and such an unusual month compared to others gone by. Space to think and focus on my wellbeing was the key priority and for the majority of the month I managed to do just that.

Benefits of gratitude and noticing joy

Taking time to pause, review my photos from the month, my calendar and journal has helped document the month for me. Sometimes we need to take a big pause in our week to orientate ourselves with the month we’ve had, feel gratitude for the moments experienced and notice the joy in the big moments but also the small every day moments too.

I wonder if you could summarise your month of May, what would it say? A helpful starting point could be…

The month of May felt…

During the month of May I…

In May I experienced joy when…